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Stuart has written 136 articles so far, you can find them below.
I was recently texting a friend and she told me that she wanted lots of things, and wanted them all to be perfect. I guess that’s the first thing I want to talk about today, followed by the idea regarding our expectations.
In many instances, it is a little difficult to put a finger on perfectionism. Not everyone can say it’s a good thing, but we all know for sure that it can’t be a bad thing in most cases. When it comes to making things happen, though perfectionism has a few drawbacks.
As a follow up to the post I did this morning (we’re a little crazy, so our training session ended around 2.30am and coaches debrief finished around 4am – kudos to the dedication of the coaches), I find that some people think that learning = going to school.
Well, metaphorically, it really is going to school, but not the school you have associations with teachers and falling asleep at flipping open the book.
In my training and therapeutic practice, I have seen many people who are very educated but they stop learning. Can you think of such people? A professor who thinks he’s always right. A spouse who tells his/her other half that something is “impossible” without actually verifying it.
It’s been a little bit of a stretch this week working on book, new participants and catching up with some friends while charting a new academic path.
I’ve come to discover more about myself over the years, and sometimes, it’s not really an easy pill to swallow. As much as I am teaching the ideas of success and achievement, I think I belong in a very different world than what people think I am living in.
Sure, a lot of achievements that I have gotten are “successes” as deemed by people: publishing a bestseller, running a multi-million dollar company, being a recognized expert in a field of expertise and so on.
There’s a saying that was popularized by Stephen Covey (originated from the Bible): “Seek first to understand, then to be understood”. It is probably one of the most important concepts in communication because to be effective in communicating, you must be able to adopt “other-centered” thinking.
What is “Other-Centered” Thinking?
Some people are self-centered. No, I’m not referring to them being ‘selfish’. Rather, I think they have little concept of “other”. In other words, they don’t consider the thoughts or feelings of other people.
I’ve been lucky to have picked up the skill of accelerated learning in my earlier years. It’s the single most important thing that has allowed me to be the person I am and fit into the knowledge economy. Having said that, I know a lot of people are struggling to develop their capabilities. Their main excuse is that learning is difficult and that they have been born with a poor memory.
Unconscious Attachments And Their Origins
I address the issue of unconscious attachment, what it is and why we should be more aware of them.
I’ve heard many takes of this concept of “healing”. I acknowledge that many of the rational approaches to counseling and therapy don’t really work. Those “rationalizations” often come across as blaming or hiding or explaining. Healing has to happen at the very visceral level, all the way down to your primal feelings. A lot of effective therapy either works directly with the brain (such as EMDR therapy) or with emotions (many forms of psychotherapy do this).
But the first step is really acknowledgement. In my opinion, healing hurts requires a cycle of recognition, so I’ve put up a podcast here on the Cycle Of Hurt and Healing (give some time for loading if you have a slow connection).
Singapore had just opened the Goh Keng Swee Academy for teachers in a bid to improve the teaching quality. After having looked at the kind of trainers we hire in our organization (who are rated some of the best according to our students), I’ve come to a conclusion that it is probably impossible to have 50,000 teachers who are passionate, dedicated and energizing to students.
Still, you can’t shun away from the need to enhance delivery methods. A good teacher has to have several tools in their presentations. Our teachers training will encompass a few that not only engage, but also inspire.
This is interesting. Not meant to be a prescriptive guide, just a list for you to consult when you need, which are life-giving ideas:
I did a brainstorm with Adam and Gary today about the needs of educators today. It’s very clear that teacher training does not just encompass the imparting of skills. Teachers are ill-equipped to handle students today, not because there are generational gaps, but because teachers are teaching students in ways that will turn out students for the 20th century, not the 21st century.
Teaching methodologies aside, it is important to recognize that the way in which we are training our students today do not inspire many students to become inquisitive problem-solvers and innovators for the future. We have to think two decades ahead and ask ourselves the serious question: are we going to be able to enable these students to function in the working world?